When I see or hear couples competing against each other on everything, career, money and even the attention and love of their kids, I wonder if they understand the simple principles of marriage.

Marriage is not just a social contract, it is a spiritual bond which binds two individuals and make them become one person. Whatever you do for your spouse is self love and what you do against them is a self inflicted injury. When one fails, no matter how you look at it, it is a failure for both of them. Once married, “I” becomes “we” and “he or “she” becomes “they” so if he or she fails, they have failed and if he or she succeeds, they have succeeded.

I have heard some men complaining that their wives no longer respect them because they have become successful, they may be right. This may also be as a result of their non supportive stance on the progress of the woman. Where they are one as stipulated in marriage, this will not be the case. Moreover the only thing they can lose is respect which doesn’t kill, but would have gained an additional support system which will lighten their burden to provide and invariably relieve them of stress, culminating in a longer healthier life. It is a win win situation for him and the family.

I have also heard and seen women pray against their husband’s progress for various reasons, either they are philandering husbands who the woman suspects of patronizing other women or they are unkind and unloving. When a man makes money, his family benefits directly or indirectly, his children in most cases will be the ultimate beneficiaries whether he likes it or not. Therefore by extension the woman indirectly benefits through her children.

There is everything to gain and nothing to lose when a spouse becomes successful. The goal should be that both of you support each other to succeed in your different fields of endeavor, however, If both of you cannot be successful, then let whoever has the grace to succeed go ahead and do so and the other should play a supporting role happily, focusing only the advantages to the family as a whole rather than on how it affects them personally. While working hard with the help of the partner to also succeed. With hard work, support and prayers of your successful partner, this is inevitable and will eventually happen.

It is important to support your spouse unconditionally in all their legitimate endeavors praying always for their success, God recognizes that you are one flesh as you pledged before him, the law and men so if he responds and blesses one of you, it is a blessing not just for you but for both of you as a couple, be careful not to invoke the wrath of God by working contrary to his plan for your family – Sir Stanley Ekezie