There is no standard rule or manual for marriage. The only guide we have is what the bible tells us about how to be in a Christian marriage. Is it really possible to have a Christian marriage in our world of today? Can women really submit the way they were directed to, can men love their wives like Christ loved the church? The dynamics of our modern society has made it almost impossible for us to completely conform to this.

There has been a lot of role switching, women are becoming bread winners and more men are taking on roles that were previously reserved for the women. The important thing is to find a balance and treat each other as equals, only then can a happy marriage be achieved. Partnerships work better than our traditional concept of marriage. This however should not negate some of the core roles of each person in a marriage.

Men are still expected to be providers and women will continue to be home builders/keepers. None of these roles is more important than the other, in fact both roles must be present to make the union successful. Just like any vehicle with passengers (family is the vehicle and the children are the passenger) there must be a captain whose ultimate instructions must be followed in times of emergency. There can never be two captains in a vessel.

A vessel with two captains is doomed to drift without direction. A man is the captain of the household and the woman is the first officer, when there is conflict of interests, she must learn to accept the authority of her husband. Men should also wield their power with compassion and in consideration of the woman’s feelings. It is important to know when you have pushed a woman to the wall, in order to avoid dissent you must back down and compromise. – Sir Stanley Ekezie