The satisfaction of courting a lady and having her willingly submit is a joy rapists can never understand. Forcing a woman to have sex against her will is a despicable act which puts the man beneath the woman. What you have proven beyond all reasonable doubts is that she is above you and out of your league, the only way you can have your way is by force. This makes you a man with a very low sense of self worth and self esteem, you have absolutely no shame, by forcing yourself on her, you have accepted that she is way above your station and can never willingly be with you.
For those who blame the woman for how she is dressed, being alone with the man or flirting, your sense of reasoning is myopic and very shallow. Every day you drive around in expensive cars, dress in fine clothes and jewellery, yet when you are robbed or kidnapped, you do not blame yourself for flaunting what you have, you suffer the anguish of loss and trauma and blame the armed robber or kidnapper for your woes. This and even worse is exactly what happens to a woman who has been raped. A rapist is like a robber whose only chance of acquiring what they cannot afford is to take it by force.
The society has not been fair to victims of rape, we have always found a way to blame the woman, questioning her dressing, her relationship with the rapist, the location of the crime etc. This is totally unfair, let us focus on the despicable crime which has been perpetrated against a young woman. Her only mistake was that she trusted someone enough to be alone with her, she cannot be blamed for this, the face is not an index of the mind, how could she have known the evil the man has planned for her. Her saying NO or STOP should be enough for any right thinking man to know that her flirting, dressing or being alone with him doesn’t mean she wants to sleep with him.
If you are a victim of rape, do not despair, you are a victim of a very serious crime, it was not your fault. It is nothing to be ashamed of, the fact that you didn’t give it up willingly is something to be proud of. You were not conned, you were not deceived, you didn’t consent to the act, you were robbed. The only way he could ever be with you is by force and that puts him way beneath you. You didn’t find him worthy to give in to his advances, you were right, he is not, he is just like a robber, it is only by force that he can have you.
Victims can fight back by naming and shaming rapists, the social media gives you a very powerful tool to do this, even if the law courts somehow sets rapists free because of wealth or influence, and in spite of society’s stand, name and shame them, at least you would have warned other women of a vile human being and saved them the agony of enduring what you went through. Bear in mind however that falsely accusing a person of rape for whatever reason is a despicable act, it is an offence punishable under the law. I advise you only name and shame those who have refused to understand that NO MEANS NO – Sir Stanley Ekezie