Fortify her defences

Every married person on earth without exception is regularly exposed to temptations, women are more exposed to this because it is natural for men to approach a woman they like irrespective of her marital status, in fact for some low lives, a married woman is their preference when scouting for new conquests. While most of them will side step these land mines and go on to have healthy and happy relationships, some will fall by the wayside, consumed by the wrong choices they have made, relationships and marriages will be destroyed as a result of succumbing to these temptations.

Our ability to resist temptations is dependent upon a couple of things, character, state of mind, the relationship with your spouse and societal value system. In Nigeria for instance and indeed in most countries, it is more likely for a man to cheat because the society inadvertently encourages this by making making male infidelity seem more like an entitlement rather than a dangerous vice.

This trend has made most of us take our wives for granted, many believe that their wives are either too old, too out of shape or too scared to attempt any act of infidelity, this is a very grievous mistake because every woman no matter how she looks is someone’s preference, someone somewhere may be making advances she is desperately trying to resist. Others believe that because of societal limitations, their wives can never find the courage to step outside the marriage.

While this may all be very close to the truth, it is known that our women today are becoming bolder, just like men, they are also attracted to other men. These women are giving the men a stiff competition in the area of infidelity. Incidents of women blatantly cheating which was previously almost unheard of is gradually becoming the order of the day.

An average woman is approached for a relationship at least once every couple of days, either at work, super market, social media, parties and sadly even in churches these days, her ability to withstand these temptations is largely dependent on her spouse. While personal character flaws may play a role in a Woman’s decision to cheat, a good relationship with her spouse will strengthen her resolve and ability to resist even the most appealing temptation.

When a woman is happy, it is extremely difficult to break her defences, she lives in a bubble always, floating in that proverbial cloud nine, too high for men to reach. Most women who cheat do so at their weakest moments which in most cases is usually during turbulent relationships with their spouse or serious lack of material things. Cheating usually starts from complaining about your relationship to a male friend who may take advantage of her weakness to initiate a relationship.

One may ask why I am concentrating so much on women, it is because women are more likely to approached by male hunters, men are on the prowl looking for a weak women to take advantage of. Secondly, In the event of infidelity, women are a lot stronger than we are when it comes to dealing with a cheating spouse, as a result of these, I am attempting to suggest ways to ensure we don’t become victims.

Most men cannot handle the idea of their wives stepping out of their marriage, the thought of it is enough to push them over the edge of a melancholic breakdown. Once faced with a cheating spouse, a man’s self esteem is destroyed, his ego battered and his world turned upside down. It maybe very difficult if not impossible for a man to completely recover from the emotional battering unleashed on him by a cheating wife.

It is therefore important to mention at this juncture that we can defend our emotions by helping to fortify a woman’s defences, making it impregnable by the way your relationship with her is structured. Always make sure that you resolve every issue before she leaves home everyday especially if she is travelling for a few days. Never let her out of your sight when she is angry or disappointed with you. Do not let issues linger, she will definitely talk to someone if you do. A woman must talk to someone especially when she is unhappy, make sure you are that someone.

Do not as a matter of utmost importance rub your relationship with another woman in her face no matter how Innocent that relationship is. When she catches you in an uncompromising position with another woman, do not argue, apologise, promise her it won’t happen again and make sure you don’t let her out of your sight until she has calmed down.

She may stop frowning or complaining after a few days, but It takes longer than you think for her to process and store it in her closet of your offences. Keep an eye on that closet to ensure it doesn’t get full, it is not a pleasant experience when the closet of your offences gets full. Random acts of kindness, affection and romance will ensure that the closet is purged regularly – Sir Stanley Ekezie

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s