Respect is earned not freely given

Women complain everyday about how disrespectful some men are, how condescending or demeaning their words or actions are to women. The fact is that a woman chooses how a man treats her, whether he respects or disrespects her depends mostly on her. The verbal or physical abuse she is subjected to is simply because she let it happen. Men take advantage of everything, they see an opportunity to disrespect a woman, the badly behaved ones will seize it, especially one which she gives to them on a platter of gold.

When a man meets a woman, he tries to determine where to place her, decent or loose, playmate or serious minded, relationship seeker or gold digger. Everything helps him build the image of who he thinks she is, from the way she talks to the way she walks, the way she dresses and the way she comports herself in public. Her physical appearance informs more than 50% of where he decides to place her. The more of a loose and wayward woman he thinks she is the more the possibility of her being disrespected. First impression seldom ever changes, once he wraps his head around that initial image, she has to go to great lengths to have him change it.

Disrespect is also certain when a man sees her body language when she gets excited around him, he assumes she has given him the green light when she walks, stands and talks in a wayward manner, this will give even the weakest man the audacity to approach her. He may be rude and sarcastic because she was probably trying too hard to get his attention, it is worse if he is comfortable or rich, he assumes all she wants is money therefore she can tolerate any insult just to get her hands on some. In this situation she has lost all self respect and the man will never take her seriously, she came too cheap. No amount of money is worth being disrespected for, no matter how much a man pays to be with you, it is cheap, you should be priceless, your body shouldn’t be for sale, it should be given only to those who deserve you and to them who you choose and not the highest bidder.

Meeting a man who will take her seriously depends on her . At a certain age she must start wearing age appropriate clothes. It is true that nudity sells, but who’s buying, she will only attract a certain category of men by walking around half naked. To be respected, she must not put herself on display, she must be confident, subtle and firm at the same time, she must be bold enough to speak her mind when she doesn’t approve of the way she has been addressed, touched or even looked at. A strong, confident and virtuous women intimidates weak and frivolous men. Trust me, most men are cowards especially the noise makers, when you are well packaged, confident and properly dressed, no man can disrespect you. You will only attract equally confident men who will approach with caution and respect.

It is important for a woman to hold her head up high always, she is one of God’s most beautiful creations, she has not been put in this world to be an object of ridicule or pleasure for men. Any attempt to entice and bait her with money should be resisted, she must not be unnecessarily and visibly excited when a man throws money at her, once she does, she will be profiled as a gold digger who can be bought and disrespected.

She should be inspired by all the powerful women who are giving men a stiff competition in business and various careers, women who are making money as much as their male counterparts, she must endeavour to work hard and earn a comfortable living, it will boost her confidence and earn her the respect she deserves. When a man makes sexist or rude remarks about her dressing or body and she accepts it with a smile, she has been disrespected and she has ignorantly accepted it with a smile. To earn respect. She must respect herself first and others will follow – Sir Stanley Ekezie

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